Frequently asked questions re parents of the groom’s wedding day?
Q. Which side of the church is to be reserved for the Bride’s family and friends?
- The left is for the bride and the right is for the groom.
Q. What is the role of the parent of the Groom?
A. The role of parents of the groom is changing. Traditionally, the parents of the groom are the least involved members of the wedding party. But they don’t have to be. Below are some suggestions as to how the Grooms’ parents can be involved.
Q. Who’s paying?
A. Although custom dictates that the bride’s parent’s pay for the bulk of the wedding, today most people are only too well aware of the expense involved and both sets of parents may want to share the costs between them. The couple themselves often contribute too. If you are sharing the costs, it’s best to make sure you have a good working relationship between you all. You need to make a list of who’s paying for everything, so that no misunderstandings arise.
If you’re not sharing costs equally, one common solution is that the groom’s family provides the wedding cake and pays for any food at the evening reception. If you can afford it, it’s a nice gesture to make.
Getting involved. Parents of the groom can do more than help out with the finances, however. This can range from the mother of the groom offering to bake the cake, to the groom’s parents offering to pay for some aspect of the reception as a present to the couple, be it the champagne, the music or the venue.
What traditionally are the groom’s parents responsible to pay for during the wedding planning and wedding?
The groom’s parents should host a rehearsal dinner prior to the wedding. They may also choose to contribute to the wedding if they desire. In most cases, the groom’s parents have limited responsibilities, but can be involved as much as the wedding couple would like. Traditionally, the groom’s mother confers with the bride’s mother on what colour gown she is wearing, so as not to go with the same shade. The groom’s parents may walk down the aisle in advance of the rest of the wedding processional and take their seats.
The old tradition is that the Groom’s parents should pay for the alcohol. Since there are always those few that make pigs of themselves when the alcohol is free it’s acceptable to give tickets to the bar for two free drinks (legal for driving after a meal of course.) Some father’s pay the whole bar bill, but it can be expensive.
Q. What shall we wear?
A. Choosing your outfits is part of the wedding fun. Apart from the limits imposed by the degree of formality of the celebrations, there’s plenty of scope for choice. Modern mothers of the groom don’t even have to wear a hat if they don’t want to — although if you’ve always fancied yourself in a Royal Ascot-style number, now’s the time. It is the bride’s mother who will first select a dress for her daughters wedding. A gown of complimentary colour and similar styling is then chosen by the mother of the groom. Tradition says Mother of the groom must wear long if the mother of the bride is wearing long or short if she wears short. The colour should not match the bridesmaids nor the brides’ mother, but compliment both.
The father of the Groom traditionally wears tops and tails if that is what the Groom is wearing.
Q. Does the father of the Groom make a speech?
A. It might not be customary for the father or mother of the groom to make a speech — but sometimes the bride and groom decide that they want to break with this particular tradition. If the couple want you to speak, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t. Go on break with tradition and make that speech.
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wedding day is always the most special day of any man and woman–*
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